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Disbelief

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I can’t always say what moves me. A lot of my art comes out as a surprise. Would I have pegged myself as being beach and water obsessed? No. But most of my encaustic work focuses exactly on that. In this case, I knew I needed to do something Sherlock but exactly what escaped me. And then I was watching, or more accurately playing in the background, the series and this scene just spoke to me. It was, of course, the moment Sherlock became something special in my head. And that was what I painted.

This is a series and you can see the first painting here. One painting, especially using the cropping I wanted, could not convey the story I wanted to play out. And so, today’s painting is part two: “Disbelief”.

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I struggled with this one a lot. There were moments I didn’t want to share on Facebook as I was painting. These are the moments that most artists hide. Where paintings fall apart and one questions one’s worth as a painter. Plus life, the universe and everything suddenly seems pointless. I call this space shitsville and it’s a shitty place to be.

Back when I was a teenager and even in my early twenties, I’d often stop paintings at this point and give up. I didn’t stop painting altogether but during this time, art was a struggle. No joy at all. I mean, look at the horrible likeness. The awful state of things. It’s enough to just make a person want to work at a fast food joint, or in a zoo cleaning the animal droppings or… or anything but paint. But, and this is the secret, do you know what? This is exactly when painting is risk free. You see,. the painting is already completely cocked up. Fuckeroo! You cannot make it worse! And so there’s only one place to go with a painting like this – up.

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Pushing on and through shitsville is so damn rewarding. If a painting can’t be pulled together, at least you’ve done your best. If it can, it’s like a train to the best place ever. Once I got through the darkness, it was a matter of refining, refining, refining. All portraits are in the details. Shadows. Teeth. Eyes.

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I am pretty darn pleased with this one.

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Holmes: This phone call, it’s… it’s my note. That’s what people do, don’t they? Leave a note.

Watson: Leave a note when?

Sherlock: Goodbye, John.

Watson: No. Don’t—
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“Disbelief” 20″x16″ acrylic on stretched canvas.

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