I create all my pieces very quickly.
I’ll admit that comes from being impatient. I want to see the outcome as much as you do. Probably more.
But I got to thinking today about that. About how I rarely work on a painting for days. How I consider four hours for large paintings excessive.
And I was thinking about that because there’s an intimacy that comes from creating art. A space between the artist and their creation that no one can step into. A very private little world.
I’m not an emotional accessible person. Not really. I consider myself more like an onion and I like to keep everyone at the outer skin. My inner layers are my own and often times I don’t acknowledge them except through my art.
As much as I share in this platform, I’m very protective of that inner self even when I choose not to think about it.
And I think that has a huge impact on my work.
That if I spend my time painting, and thinking only about get it done get it done, I’m not allowing myself to be in the process of creating. The journey, if you will.
I’m all about the end game.
But if we take what I wrote yesterday about life being all about the journey, and then spin it down smaller to art being all about the journey, then it’s clear I have a problem.
And I’m not saying that I don’t put myself into each piece, because I do. There’s no way to create emotionally powerful paintings without it. But I am saying I’m not putting enough of myself into the act of creating.
That maybe it’s not about the speed or getting it done, though my ego is all about those things. Maybe it’s about slowing down and really becoming one with my art to the point where selling a piece, or moving it to a show, would really put a hole in my world.
That level of emotional connection scares me. A lot. So clearly I need to do it.
I’m not sure how to go about doing that but I do know this: I have canvas here that’s not ear marked for any project, I have time and I have the desire to change the way I connect with my work.
Let’s see what happens.